By Josue Sierra,
Eleven years ago this week, the U.S. Supreme Court issued its decision in Obergefell v. Hodges, redefining marriage nationwide. At the time, supporters promised the debate was over.
Americans were told the country had reached a new consensus and that anyone who continued defending marriage as the union of one man and one woman would soon find themselves on the wrong side of history. But history has a way of exposing the difference between cultural narratives and enduring truths.
New national polling released by Them Before Us this week suggests that, beneath years of political messaging and media pressure, Americans continue to recognize something fundamental: children need both a mother and a father whenever possible.
The survey of 1,200 likely general-election voters who identify as conservative or moderate found overwhelming agreement on principles that once formed the foundation of public policy. An extraordinary 96% say it is important for a child to be raised with both an involved mother and father. Seventy-five percent believe children do best when raised by a loving mother and father. Nearly eight in ten(78%) agree that when children’s needs conflict with adult desires, children’s needs should come first.
Perhaps most notably, 66% reject the claim that being raised by two people of the same sex is no different for a child than being raised by an adoptive mother and father.
These findings do not suggest hostility toward any group of people. They suggest something much simpler: Americans still instinctively understand that marriage exists for more than adult fulfillment.
As I recently wrote in the Bucks Independence, “The question is no longer simply, ‘Who should be allowed to marry?’ Increasingly, Americans are asking, ‘What is marriage actually for?‘”
That is the question many believed Obergefell had permanently settled. Instead, it has become increasingly difficult to ignore.
Marriage has never existed primarily to validate adult relationships. Governments throughout history have recognized marriage because it uniquely unites men and women as husbands and wives and provides the ideal environment for children to know and be raised by the mother and father who brought them into the world. While not every family achieves that ideal because of death, divorce, or other tragic circumstances, the ideal itself remains worth protecting.
That understanding is why the Pennsylvania Family Institute opposed House Bill 2269 when it was considered and passed the Pennsylvania House in 2024. Although the legislation was largely symbolic because of Obergefell, it sought to remove Pennsylvania’s longstanding definition of marriage as between one man and one woman and replace it with the gender-neutral phrase “two individuals.”
The bill ultimately died in the Pennsylvania Senate, but the debate illustrated a much deeper disagreement. Is marriage simply about recognizing adult relationships, or does society have a legitimate interest in preserving an institution uniquely connected to children, mothers, and fathers?
This new polling suggests most center-right voters have already answered that question.
The findings also challenge another common assumption: that this conversation belongs only inside churches. While regular churchgoers express the strongest agreement, the survey found that 43% of people who never attend church still believe every child should be legally recognized as having both a mother and a father. That reflects a conviction grounded not only in religious belief but also in human experience.
As Josh Hammer, a Senior Editor-at-Large at Newsweek, observed in response to the findings, “Despite years of relentless messaging from the media, academia, and corporate America, most Americans still recognize a fundamental truth: children do best when raised by their mother and father whenever possible.”
Public opinion alone does not determine truth. But polling can reveal whether public conversation accurately reflects what people actually believe.
For years, Americans who defended the importance of mothers, fathers, and marriage were often portrayed as holding an outdated or fringe position. These new numbers tell a different story. The consensus remains broader than the public conversation often admits.
Eleven years after Obergefell, the debate is no longer centered solely on adult rights. Increasingly, Americans are returning to the question that should have been at the center all along: What arrangement best serves the interests of children?
The answer, it appears, remains remarkably consistent with what the Bible has been saying for thousands of years.
